Learning how to cook

So last night I tried cooking dinner for my boyfriend for the first time. The experience was interesting. I am someone who despises cookign and slaving over hot stoves; microwaves are my best friends at dinner time. However, I figured I needed to show my appreciation for his taking care of me while I was lying ill for the past week. After a friend suggested making him a home-cooked meal, I thought, why not. What could possible go wrong?

So, I downloaded a recipe to make clam linguini. The instructions didn't seem too difficult. So, I went to the market and bought all the ingredients and was ready to put on my chef's hat. Everything went smoothly at first until I had to make the sauce. The recipe calls for simmering the clams until all the juice has evaporated. The entire process took 3 hours!!! I must have missed a step somewhere. By the time I was done, it was already 10 p.m. and I personally had lost my appetite.

Being the sweet and considerate person he is, my boyfriend didn't complain at all and still ate the dish despite it not tasting very good at all, to be honest. So what did I learn? I learned that I am indeed culinarily-challenged and if I ever want to show appreication through food again, I will use the services of www.yelp.com.

Today I learned something about myself after taking an online quiz that tests to see if you're a "good" girlfriend from this site http://www.relationshipheadquarters.com/quiz/are-you-a-good-girlfriend.html. LOL... It all seems so silly, but I went ahead and did it anyway for the purpose of writing this blog. The results came out indicating that although I have a pretty good grasp of my own self-worth, I can be too accommodating when in a relationship. So, I started doing some introspection and evaluated my behaviors in the past.
The analysis holds true to some degree. I generally prefer to avoid conflict and give more in relationships. I have never allowed myself to "complain" thinking it was immature to do. When issues arise, I deal with them as logically and reasonably as I could, never letting my emotions override the contexts. All the time, I thought being that way was part of being a "good" girlfriend. After a while, pent up, unattended emotions always blow up at certain points over trivialities, causing the men to think that I'm overexaggerating and being melodramatic.
So, according to relationship experts, that's not only unhealthy for my esteem but also insalutary to a relationship and how I'm perceived by my partner. Instead of sweeping those emotions under the rug, I should be more candid and learn to verbalize them. Even though I know this is such textbook advice, to actually apply this will require me stepping out of my comfort zone and frankly, a very scary thing to do. Why do I feel this apprehension, I'm not quite sure because god knows there's no good reason for it. One thing I do know is that if I don't want to end up feeling drained as before, I must learn to change my so-called "considerate" ways and find that balance between what I really want & what I think I want.

Blogging for the first time

         For someone like myself who's never kept a diary nor used any social networking systems and refuse to sign up for Facebook, writing random things for blogging purposes feels pointless and downright dreadful, to say the least. However, there's always a first time for everything, I suppose. Who knows, maybe I'll even be addicted to this after trying it. I don't know why, but keeping a tab on my thoughts is so difficult and that explains why I've put off doing this assignment for as along as I could.

Okay, so the theme for my blog is "How to be a 'good' girlfriend". I know it sounds completely 19th century and so not "I am woman; hear me roar!", but I believe it's important regardless. I think to be happy in a relationship, the other person has to feel the same joy (if not more). Being in my 30's now, that's one thing I've learned in the love department. It's really not about "me" and what the other person can do for to make me happy or our relationship work, but rather, what can "I" do foster the happiness in the other person. After 5+ years of being single after a tumultuous and exhaustive relationship, getting involved with someone new seems so strange, scary, and well, so much work! Especially if I have been living life perfectly fine and fulfilled with family, work, school, and friends. Nothing appeared to be missing. 

However, my perspectives have since then altered just a tad bit when I met a wonderfully sweet man about a month ago through a mutual friend. Because of his candid yet non-aggressive approach, I found myself feeling a nice sense of safety and warmth. For the first time in god knows how long, I felt a sense of "missing".  So after a week of hour-long conversations about everything and nothing all at the same time, we went on our first official date.

Below is a photo of the Argentinean restaurant where we went for our date. It's in Old Town Pasadena. We originally went there thinking it was Gaucho Grill, but discovered something even more wonderful. The atmosphere is cozy and pleasant and the service is excellent. Also, if you're a steak lover, definitely try their signature grilled skirt steak. YUM! 

http://www.yelp.com/biz/1810-argentinian-restaurant-pasadena